i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Randomize
