its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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