god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Randomize