So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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