Having a random hookup so left but love u
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Randomize
