Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize