The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
