Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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