i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
