Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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