dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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