Well apparently he's into motor boating.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
