wrigley field is MILF paradise
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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