we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
