you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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