the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
