i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
