have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?