Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I need to sanitize my soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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