I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
