Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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