if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize