3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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