YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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