Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Randomize
