Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Randomize
