Yo dont text me then not text me
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
