I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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