Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Randomize