i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Randomize
