I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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