Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
