mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
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