He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.