I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
