Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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