i think i have two assholes
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
