My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize