I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
