I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
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The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
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After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
A bitchslap is in order.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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