As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
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