dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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