Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize