My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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