Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
