Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
