Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
