you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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