I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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