I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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