do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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