My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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